Draw a Line in the Sand

How did I get here?

Lets start with the facts:    Back in 2013, I had reached my high point of fitness completing the full deluxe 60 day program of Insanity and losing that final 10 lbs to reach 185lbs.   I was super great shape and my body was reacting and looking the way I wanted it too.   Upon reaching 185lbs it was the final step of five year journey beginning in 2008 to lose 55 lbs.   from 2008 to 2010, I lost 45 lbs with two rounds of P90X.   Even more so, I had done Beachbody’s Ultimate Reset, kinda of a nutrition 21 day juggernaut which is not for the faint of heart.   It was from there that  helped me to clean up any lingering nutrition issues about my commitment to reach my physical and weight goals.   More importantly, I had over the last two years completed  many 3 day refreshes, which is a 3 day mini reset of your body and helps to clean out the body with solid nutrition and allows for detoxification which lasts for three days and helps to curb any urges or bad habits that may have set in.    Moving on to last year, I was 195lbs and I wasnt super great shape but I could hold my own.  My pushups, situp and pull ups were all pretty adequate.  While I thought  I had reached my  potential in my physical life and was certainly in control, the past six months would say otherwise.   Back in July of this year, My nutrition was 80-90% intact.  But over the last year, I have consumed more fast foods, more candy, more processed food that I have probaly ate in all the last three years combined and have gained 25lbs in the last three months.  I cant tell you why, I have over analysized it to death and I have come up with nothing but excuses.

OFF The Wagon

My sweet tooth seemed like it was never ending. My love for the convienence of fast food soared. To make matters worst, I started being influenced by co workers and good friends on trying new foods which had never happened in the past five years. Im sure You know how that goes, “Hey Dave, come with us we are trying out the new mexican plaace down the street” (where we proceeded to have tons of salt, sugar and fat) and we gobble down appetizers and full course meals like we havent ate in 3 weeks. Nutritionally, My only constant good food over the last year was Shakeology! Poor nutritional discipline, lack of meal planning to eat the right foods and intellectually knowing that I had to make a change but not actually executing and doing the change that is required has lead me to 220lbs. It is just mind bogelling! Im actually ashamed to have written those last numbers. 25lbs increase. Unheard of!

Going along to get along (internally)

So most of my nutritional bad habits came from just hanging out with friends and family. Ya, know, you get that question all the time in your head, Why be so difficult with your eating, just eat this one time? then again! then again! pretty soon your down the path of Standard American Diet (SAD) and it really becomes SAD! Just going along to get along is the battle of self discipline. The many little times you say “oh this one time wont hurt me” But then one time leads to five times and five times leads to developing a bad habit and then in a couple weeks a bad habit has set in. The pot lucks! The many pot lucks! lets be frank here, to eat very healthy is hard. It is hard but it is doable. It takes planning. To eat fast food is very easy. It is convenient. To meal plan takes effort and then the self discipline to eat what you have planned and prepared! I have written on this blog before about the battle of why not . It takes that positive self conversation with yourself to help to keep you on the road to success.

The Easy Life

“For narrow is the gate, and straitened the way, that leadeth unto life, and few be they that find it.”   –Matthew 7:14

My workouts have been sproadic not done with any training pattern to them which isnt physical training at all. I did manage to will myself thru a 4 week running program to complete my first 5k in 30:31. Despite training for the 5k, Im quite disgusted with myself. I vowed back in 2008, that once I lost this weight, I would NEVER put it back on. I would fight tooth and nail to NEVER put it back on. I would never be this heavy again. But reality has set in and it has happened. Deep down we all know the easy life doesnt allow us to reach our dreams or to reach our potential. We, human beings, are made for much more. We are made to perform at our peak. To reach our potential. In Eric Greitens great book, Resilence, he details “It’s often easier to imagine that a guy with horns and a pitchfork has harmed us than to realize how we have harmed ourselves. Yet we are usually our own worst enemy. We throw obstacles in our own path. If we had an external enemy who consistently forced us to make bad choices, to engage in self- destructive behavior, to be less than we are capable of, we’d declare war. Why should we act any differently when the enemy is inside? You have to master the one who throws obstacles in your way. Master yourself. Over the long run, you are responsible for your happiness. I don’t say this to blame you for how you feel. I say it because in taking responsibility you will find freedom and power.”

Ahhh, how to master ourselves is always the answer! I love personal development because you find a gem like this to put you back on the right course of action.

A Line in the Sand

So after my pity party of two or three days, which should have last 5 minutes, then comes the next inevitable question. Sooooooooo, What are you going to do about it? Whats your plan? Do you have what it takes to battle back to the top of the mountain again? Then the fear sets in, what if I fail at the workouts, what if i fail at the nutrition, what if I can never lose the weight again, what if and what if…and more fear and more fear..and more questions and the endless loop of self criticism sets. Im sure you have seen this movie before?!

Back to Greitens book, Resilence, what does he say “If you want to feel different, act differently” well damn, I know that! lol but then comes his wisdom. He goes on “This aint complicated, my friend. But it’s amazing how many people get it wrong for so long. Just begin with ”who am I going to be?“ You decide to be courageous again. So whats next? Act that way. Act with courage. And here comes the part thats so simple its easy to miss: the way you act will shape the way you feel. You act with courage and immediately your fears start to shrink and you begin to grow.”

AHHHH, such great stuff. deep breath! Thank you Eric Greitens for such great great wisdom! I have work to do! Just ordered the newest workout program The Master’s Hammer and Chisel! Its not about my feelings, it is about my actions.




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